Getting Acquainted

Last week was pretty epic in terms of life events. Meeting Michael was something I had been waiting for for over 28 years and for all I knew, it could have been another five or ten years. I’m so glad it wasn’t one day longer than it was. 

Michael and I have been communicating almost daily and it is simply amazing. When I see his name and our photo pop up on my phone, my heart skips a beat, it’s surreal. What I know for sure is that I am so, so thankful that Michael is excited to get to know me, he is kind, smart, and funny. For something that, for all intents and purposes should be awkward and uncomfortable, it’s been incredibly easy. We talked about it and my take was two fold, first it’s my belief that when it’s right between two people, it’s not hard. What is right? To me, right is open communication, respect, and the sincere desire to be together. I have this with Dave in my marriage and it appears I have this with Michael. The second point is possibly Karma, it’s possible that the good choices, the many times we did the right things instead of the easy things are coming back around. I do believe we get back what we put out and if this is my reward, I’ll take it! I will say, I feel things that seem so odd to me, yet so normal. For example, I find myself thinking about him constantly, I want to know what he’s doing, where he’s going, how he lives, what kind of TV do he and his fiancé Sari like to watch, does he have a favorite candy, does he like games & puzzles? It’s all so random but no matter what I’m thinking, all the while I want to hug and hold him. Then I get a little embarrassed and think, “He doesn’t even know me, why would he want me to hold him?” Could it be that missing piece, the physical touch that creates the deeper connection? I don’t know but I will continue with what I feel. It’s what I know and who I am, it’s all I can authentically offer. I feel so blessed, so lucky, so… I don’t know what other words describe what it means to me to have this opportunity to know this man.

Many people have asked me how Mason is taking all of this and for the most part, he’s been great. He was so excited to have Michael and Sari in our lives but I can also see that he doesn’t necessarily love that my attention is not all his. Mason is an incredible young man, he is confident and smart and he knows how deeply I love him. I am sure we will all be fine, no, better than fine, we are building an amazing family of 5!